Hello From The Other Side

I’ve put off blogging. There’s just so much I want to get down and I’m not really sure where to start. So let's just get into it.

Y’all, my spleen ruptured! And because we like to keep things interesting around here, it didn’t rupture once, but twice! Really. My PCP (primary care physician) jokingly reminded me that I should never want to be interesting to doctors- that when it comes to my health, boring is the way to go. I couldn’t agree more. Physicians finding my spleen fascinating is the last thing we need, but things go the way they go.

Visiting with Molly the service dog.

The short end of it is that I had two non-traumatic spontaneous splenic ruptures. The first was repaired excellently and held strong. The second rupture happened after I was released from the ICU and was in an entirely different area. We’re so grateful that my surgeon decided to remove my spleen completely because it was in surgery that they discovered the cause of all my discomfort- the second rupture.

Mike and my best friend, Meghan lotioning my feet and making me laugh.

I could end there. That's what happened on the clinical end. But there was so much more and I'm having a hard time putting words to emotion and tying all the loose ends together, because we were wrecked. Wreckage is messy and things don't quite fit into the spaces that were there before because nothing is the same. The whole experience was jarring. Going from sitting in bed doing my bible study to the ICU, Mike going from finishing up laundry to calling up our closest people and having no real reason why all of this was happening- confusing. Especially for a guy who likes having the answers.

Michael decided I needed to get out of the house, so he drove me to the nail salon and treated me to a mani/pedi.

We still don't have answers. Pathology came back showing a rupture consistent with trauma. There was no trauma. So, we're in this new space where there is no logical explanation, where we try to make sense out of something that doesn't. There were a few very scary moments, but more than that, there were beautiful ones. Teams of our loved ones pulled together to get kids to where they needed to go and make sure they felt secure. I was never, not even once, alone in the hospital. Mike has been able to telework since I was released. Our sweet, loving church family has provided dinners for us since I came home demonstrating for our children what it is to be lifted up, prayed over, and loved without condition of repayment. There has been so.much.good. We are so grateful.

My sweet friend, Megan, propped up LG on a pillow so I could spend time with her post-hospital.

I'd really like to end by saying thank you. Thank you for praying for our family, for the comments on our fb page, and the messages of encouragement you sent. Thank you also for your patience as I try to get back into the groove of blogging. I've missed it, and I'm looking forward to giving voice to a few key things that have happened over the last month involving our foster care journey.

Photo courtesy of the immensely talented Shannon Lafayette with Shannon Lafayette Photography.